Operation: Purge-COMPLETE

I went to Kmart and bought a whole bunch of bins, different sizes and colors (for my holiday needs). I got them at a great deal! $5 each! Needless to say I went straight to work! I cleaned out my closet. I filled 2 black garbage bags with clothes and shoes to donate. I organized all of my holiday decor and memory boxes. What an exhilarating feeling! I even cleaned out my memory boxes. While rummaging through I found many holiday and birthday cards from my family and friends. A few friends in particular had given me a card for every occasion imaginable. It was so cool looking back on memories, though I did purge and recycle some of them. This took me about 2 weekends to go through everything. I had piled a few things to sell. I figured I would try to make some money on things I have that are in great condition. My family and I had a garage sale and I even sold some things on ebay! I definitely suggest trying this! One person's trash is another one's treasures, One person's loss is another one's gain! After I was done at my parent's house I went back to my apartment and purged and re-organized there too! Doing this led me to a DIY project that I cannot wait to start over the Christmas break. Yes! You heard correctly! My job has been so generous as to give the company the week between the holidays off! Who knew that happened in Corporate America?!

My next organizing project is tackling my jewelry and costume jewelry. I have tons of it that I don't even wear! I will definitely be donating those I am getting rid of. For everything I am keeping I will be building a jewelry storage box. As I have said in a previous blog, I live in a small apartment. So my thinking to be a space saver and to build this unit so it can hang on the wall. I have never build anything like this and I cannot wait to begin! Stay Tuned...

Operation: Purge

I tend to focus on life lessons and changes but there is more when it comes to ReVamping your life. For instance, I love being organized! The Container Store was invented by and for people like me! Type A personality, everything has its place and there is a place for everything type thinking.

Moving into my small apartment I had to be creative on ways to organize and store. I bought a couch that had an attached chaise. The chaise pops open and you can store things in the bin underneath. I also have drawer bins under my bed, hooks on the inside of my kitchen cabinets hold my pot tops and I turned a three cabinet storage unit into my pantry.

Though I have everything I need in my apartment my old room at my parents house still has tons of stuff! I have most of my crafting and baking supplies there. Also, my prom dresses and all of my 'going out on the town' dresses with stilettos to match! I have beach bags, handbags, and clutches, more regular clothing, books, DVDs, pictures still hanging on the walls. My desk is filled with papers, phone wires, nick-knacks, magazines and so on. Now, this does not include everything I have in the basement! I have my photo albums, memory boxes filled with yearbooks, my sweet 16 tiara, my first doll and stuffed animal, cast boards from my high school drama club days, teen bop posters, favorite cards received from holidays and birthdays, and more! Along with other bins and bags containing holiday decor, most of which I crafted myself over the years. My mom is under the impression once my fiance and I move in together all of this stuff is coming with me...isn't she funny? I know people may think I am a pack rat, I prefer to think of it more as these things have sentimental value to me. There are times where I will sit and go through my old stuff and laugh about old memories with a friend or my family. At the end of the day, I have a ton of stuff!!

My Mission: Purge everything I do not need and have not used in the past 6 months! Deadline: New Year 2015!!

First Step: Getting Rubbermaid bins!

Make Your Own Happy

How cool is it to see someone's dreams come true? To see those you love be so happy with their lives. It is something I have been in tuned too these past months. When my fiance and I became engaged it was heart warming to see people who I was so happy for be happy for me. It is not just a wonderful time for me and my family but also for my friends. I have friends making big moves, changing jobs, having babies, excelling in their career, having a flourishing business, and raising cutie pie kids! It is a prime time where adulthood is brightly shining and seeing people embrace that and basque in the blessings and happiness is so beautiful to witness.

ReVamping your life can happen at anytime. People change because they want to change. People's lives also change when someone or something has entered. It is how you react to this that leads you to your next chapter. Whether it is a little miracle with a beautiful face, a love so strong you thought you would have to wait a lifetime to experience, or moving to a place where you can make a brand new beginning.

No matter what it is, be sure to take the positive out of every moment in life, make your own happiness. Even in the negative there is a positive! The best thing you can do is be the best version of yourself everyday. No regrets, take a risk, trust in the leap of faith. Think about it. The world would be a better place if there was more love. You must love yourself completely before you can truly love anyone/anything else.

Enough

Is there an Enough button? A point in your life when you not only said 'Enough!' but actually felt it. Those moments when you realize you want to change, whether it be yourself or your surroundings. Is this possible with people? Can relationships toll out? Romantic relationships can reach this point but what about family and friends. Do they get a pass? Is it a constant cycle?

It is easy to relate compassion to empathy. Though the emotions behind these words may be similar the action is different.

"Empathy is an emotional response to a person’s situation or well being. It is a word that is often associated with distressing circumstance or emotion. Empathy is when you try to understand how the particular individual may be feeling. You may very well imagine yourself in the same situation, developing in your mind the same emotions as the person you are feeling empathy for. By showing your empathy, you are creating a passive emotion towards an individual. Although you feel the same emotions, you do not take actions on your feelings; you do nothing to alleviate the emotions of the person you are feeling empathy for.

Compassion is a word used to express the same feeling as empathy. Yet when you feel compassion, you have more of a desire to take action. You can understand a person’s pain. You place yourself in the shoes of the individual, but you feel that you want to achieve more. Compassion is an emotion which calls for action. If a person is distressed you want to provide the individual with comfort; you want to take action to ensure a positive outcome." (www.differencebetween.net, 2014)

So you have empathized with someone and have taken action. Time and time again it seems as though efforts have failed. Should that be internalized or externalized? Is it you or them? People have what I like to call "the therapist" gene. A personality trait where one wants to endless help others. This can be mentally and emotionally draining if one does not care for themselves properly. So what happens when you give all that you can give? When you feel as though you have had 'enough'? Cut the cord with the person or situation. Do not be discouraged. People will take the help they want. This is not always equivalent to what they truly may need. Try your best to let it go. No matter what the relationship or situation is it is important to take a look at yourself and see what you need. What recharges you? You need to release the negativity that others and possibly even you are bringing into your life.

Our minds are powerful; our thoughts, our words, our emotions. So often as a society we point to other people. We blame them, judge them, criticize them. What about you? Take pride in learning from life lessons and moving forward. The thought of improving ourselves should not be a selfish one, yet a simplistic one. How we act, what we say to people, the way we think. This is a reflection of us as individuals. At the end of the day, happiness with yourself is what should matter. Those that need your help will appreciate and hopefully be inspired by you. I truly believe if you are happy with yourself life falls into place and those who are also happy will surround you. and Remember to take care of yourself.

This is What Makes Life Divine

People often say they are so happy they "are on cloud nine". I also like to refer to this as a happy high. We all get them at different point in our lives. They come and go. This past year I have learned a new kind of happiness. A complete one. I have found the missing piece to my heart. Once I surrendered myself, found personal peace and released control, I let life lead me. Everything seemed to fall into place and as that happened I fell in love. It's a happy feeling that remains. A feeling that has become apart of who I am. It is even more wonderful when another person feels the same about you!

I recently celebrated my one year anniversary with my boyfriend. That weekend he gave me the surprise of a lifetime...he proposed! That was the best day of my life (so far!). Cloud nine had a new meaning for me. It's a feeling that fills you up inside. Complete, true happiness; the person I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. Happiness along with love, faith, inspiration and other wonderful feelings filled me and strengthened as our relationship grew deeper. That moment of looking down at him as tears filled my eyes, listening to him ask me to marry him brought me to a place that dreams must be made of; cloud nine. One thing, the exception that this is real life! 

I am truly thankful for all the blessings I have received. I am so excited for the journey ahead and the next chapter my fiance and I are about to begin!

Make it Work for You

Most college graduates aren't able to find jobs and if they do it most likely isn't in their field. According to the Washington Post only 27% of college graduates get a job in their field of study. I was there if you remember? I graduated with my Masters and though there were jobs in sight none were reached My career went down a path I would have never expected. Life led me to a job I not only was good at, but one that I enjoyed! This is what should be told to recent graduates! Don't put yourself in a mold. Don't be disappointed if you don't work in your field of study (most people don't). Hard work pays off, Always!! Not only did I receive a promotion in under a year; three months after that I was being contacted by recruiters and human resource departments from other companies. I suddenly found myself being offered interviews without submitting my resume (thanks LinkedIn!).

If I wouldn't have taken that temp job out of grad school who knows where I would be! It's important to remember doors open and close all the time. Opportunities do not sit and wait for anyone. If you choose a door and it leads down a not so great path, trust that another door will open and lead you down a happier one. Keep going no matter what! No one ever said life was easy. If life were easy it wouldn't be worth living. Head up, it's okay to make new goals. Do not wait for something to come to you. Go out there and take charge of your life! It's okay to find different paths. Just keep going!

Friend (noun)

Definition: a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard; a person who gives assistance; supporter

One of my younger cousins has had girls in her school make fun of her. I tell her, “No one can make you feel bad about yourself.” I have told her this a few times along with other things to try to get her to believe she is stronger than someone else's words and actions. She is 10 years old. Here I am, screeching towards 30, trying so hard to take my own advice. It’s not easy…it’s not easy to not let other people make you feel bad about yourself. It’s not easy to kick someone out of your mind. Over the years, I have had people walk into and out of my life. The friends I have lost I have questioned why. Looking back events within those relationships show why the friendship became strained. 

I feel as though I am currently losing another friend. Friendships are apart of our humanity. We are born to be social, to interact with one another. Getting older either your friends grow with you or you grow apart. That's life. My best friend from high school is still my best friend. We do not talk everyday but when we need one another we reach out. I still have a couple of good friends from high school, I still keep in touch with the girls I use to dance with. I still keep in touch with a couple of friends from my first real job after college. 

When I think about the wonderful friends I have had in life it's fun to see all the crazy and fun times and to see how far we have come. And when I look back at pictures of myself and this friend I remember all the good times and laughs. This is the first time in my life where I have hit a rough patch with a friend. I have never had a blow out fight or anything of that nature with any friend. It has been that distance grew for some rhyme or reason.

The skills I learned from counseling have become apart of my every day life especially when a friend is having a tough time and they ask for advice. It's as though I have been permanently uniformed to help others grow as individuals. I become disappointed when this does not happen but I understand I cannot do it all. Well, I come to that understanding once I have hit the 'nothing left' wall. That is where I am now. I am a solver, I am honest, I like to help. Come to me with a problem and I will do everything I can to help, even if it there are no words and just a hug. One of the most important things learned from my personal life and short counseling career is that you can only help those who want to be helped. Growing up in a Christian home the saying, 'God helps those who help themselves' really comes to truth. I have reached this point with this friend. I am trying to embrace this growing pain completely instead of just holding it waiting to see if something else will happen to change this course. Time heals pain, and it also shows truth. Hanging on to faith, I know this will all work out the way it is meant to. 

In the words of one of my very good friends, "Friendships are hard...Don't stress...there is a bigger reason why this is happening"- G

A late New Year

Well...as I have done in past years I wrote a letter to 2013 on New Years Eve. I don't know why but it didn't post. I'd like to think it's fate and not technical difficulty. In the past year my life completely changed. I went from a person grasping for straws in 2012 to someone who surrendered and found herself in a new career, new independence and new found love in 2013. If there is anything to look back to it's where you have come from and how far the road has been. You are never too old to learn about life and about who you are and who you want to be as an individual. We all have things in life we would have changed but at the end of the day your choices have brought you to this very moment. 2014 has started off stressful. If these past two weeks are a predictor than this year will most certainly be challenging. As cliche as it may seem remember to make it your year! It's never too late to ReVamp your life.